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My new grill is on the way

Posted on by Caleb

Because living in a house without a grill of any sort is simply wrong; I have managed to acquire through various channels the following grill/smoker.

It’s a Traeger grill, which if you didn’t know are simply the finest grilling machines known to earthly man. Couple that with the fact that my specific grill is the Smith & Wesson .22 Magnum edition, and well – it’s perfect.

I didn’t really need a gigantic grill; since this one is marketed more for camping/tailgates/small gatherings, it’s the perfect size for a two person household that has occasional company over.

How does it go again?

“This is my grill. There are many like it, but this one is mine. My grill is my best friend, it is my life. I must master my grill as I must master my life. My grill without me is useless; without my grill, I am useless.”

You get the idea.

blogs

Well, it’s a slow day

Posted on by Caleb

So I typed “Gun Control” in news.google.com and low and behold, I manage to find (another) anti-gun editorial.

What really makes this one amusing is that it almost exactly follows the satirical formula I laid out for writing an anti-gun editorial. Since I’m kind of a sarcastic and snarky mood, I’m just going to copy/paste the thing in here, piece by piece, and add commentary.

First off, the “article” is published in the notoriously anti-gun Huffington post; it’s so predictable that it’s almost laughable in its content. So, here we go.

I grew up in a house with guns. My Grandfather (I called him Papa) had a rifle in the closet, and I used to open the closet door, stare at it, and even once or twice reached out and touched it.

I never played with it. Why? Because, quietly rebellious punk that I thought was, I knew my ass would be spanked, hard, if I was caught with it.

Yes, establish your credibility with gun owners. You guys must feel an almost burning desire to start things like this. I do like the part about how your respect for your Papa’s rules prevented you from messing with his guns, that same respect did the same for my father’s guns.

I shot the gun a few times a few years later. My Dad & I took it into the desert so I could try to kill a few peaceful creatures for a college Biology project. I was supposed to stuff and mount 3 small mammals. Oddly enough, in 5th grade, I had checked a book out from the Bookmobile called, if I recall, “Practical Taxidermy”. Of course, at that age, it was a giggle, a schoolboy fascination with things gross and icky.

I have nothing mean to say here – I do wish that I had cool courses like that when I was in 5th grade. Oh, how the times have changed.

I truly had no idea how gross and icky it was until I shot the head off a desert squirrel. Seeing blood spurt, and tiny broken bits of bone was jarring. And frustrating, because the animal had to be whole for the display.

Translation: People who kill cute fuzzy animals are bad, bad people. You’re a bad person for wanting to kill cute fuzzy animals. Nevermind that the goddamn squirrels are prepping for an invasion.

I hate guns. I recognize their sad neccessity, for law enforcement, and soldiers. But I have absolutely no comprehension how a human can enjoy killing a creature and call it sport. Some of my beliefs I am willing to call personal failings. I recognize that some may legitimately enjoy professional wrestling, whereas I think it’s idiotic. But I own my feelings about guns. No one is going to change my mind.

Like I said, you’re a bad, bad man for enjoying hunting. Why? Because this guy says so. Shucks, I’m just going to turn in my rifles now. On the flip side, at least he’s honest that he’s completely closed minded on the gun issue. His willingness to admit that he’s completely unwilling to engage in honest debate is almost refreshing.

I regularly hear from folks on an email list, many of them conservatives and libertarians, that guns are lovely pieces of engineering and should be appreciated. They prattle on about various loads and calibers. I think they are certifiably insane.

So, because I like something that you don’t like, I’m crazy? That’s awesome! I’ve always believed that people who didn’t agree with me were crazy, does this mean that I can go around just telling people “sorry, you don’t hold the same opinions as me – you must be nuts!”

So, I’ll skip the next part, because the author just quotes a section of the NY Times, which is basically a combination of being glad that the NICS bill is passing coupled with bitching about the Tiahrt Amendment. But, if you couple his support of “no guns for crazies” with the fact that he thinks that everyone who wants to own a gun is crazy, well…you get the idea.

Here’s his conclusion:

All the arguments by people who want to keep guns in their houses fail even casual scrutiny to me. Statistics, while open to interpretation, show far more danger from those guns than any perceived benefit. To me, it’s a bit like any addiction: one will torture logic to support the addiction, no matter how harmful. These people just want to have guns around.

I think that’s crazy.

Completely disregarding all the statistics that talk about how many times guns have been used in self-defense; his summary point is to once again just basically say that if you want to own a gun for the sake of having the thing – you’re nuts. Because since cars kill a lot more people than guns, anyone who wants to a car that isn’t made of Nerf is crazy.

We’re all crazy.

Like I said though, at least this guy is honest in his contempt for gun owners. Basically, the article written above is a wank-piece to show how cool some guy is to his liberal friends. It’s basically the literary equivalent of showing off for your peers. “Look at me, I can do Random Action X that makes me edgy and awesome!”

So boring.

self defense

Martial arts

Posted on by Caleb

A conversation at my other internet home someone devolved into a debate about martial arts; which for anyone not in the MA community is rather similar to the debate between 1911 cultists enthusiasts and rabid equally enthusiastic Glock fans.

I believe that the actual debate was on the merits of point-sparring (disparagingly referred to as “slap and tickle”) vs. full contact sparring in the context of which better prepares you for “the street”.

I’m actually quite fond of the martial arts, both the traditional MA with their quite lovely katas and precision; I’m also fond of the more combative based martial arts with their focus on effectively disabling an attacker. Now, in the “combat oriented” arts, there is quite a difference on what people define as “effectively disabling”, but that’s not the point of this discussion.

I also like martial arts that focus on the use of weapons, such as Eskrima, Kendo, Western Fencing, and Defensive Handgun. To me, a “martial art” has always been defined as the study and practice of any technique which prepares one for combat; and in that definition I seem to have the support of (at least) wikipedia.

Currently, my practice of martial arts such as Tai Chi and Taekwondo is limited to their utility as exercise; as my (note the emphasis) personal experience (your mileage may vary) has show that kicking people in the head while they’re standing is of limited utility in actual fights.

Now, before you get mad at me for disparaging your favorite kickfest; I’m not saying that your martial art of choice is bad or ineffective. I’m saying that it didn’t really work for me, personally.

I encourage the study of martial arts, especially for people that carry a firearm on a day to day basis. Not only because it assists with your reflexes, etc, but because it can also provide you with some valuable close quarter fighting skills. Especially if you’re even in a situation where you’re A) unarmed, or B) can’t get your gun out.

Now, if you do decide to look into martial arts for defensive purposes, remember the adage “you fight like you train”. Bear that in mind when selecting a dojo; try to observe classes and see if that particular system seems like a good fit for you.

Finally, try to avoid “teachers” that advocate lots of neck breakers, stomping on people’s necks, etc. While the ability to kill a person with your bare hands has some utility, it has again been my experience that if you’re in a position to kill someone with your bare hands, you’re also in a position to disable them without taking their life.

Uncategorized

Smaller, lighter, faster

Posted on by Caleb

It seems that trend in automatic weapons continues to be smaller, lighter, and faster. You could (convincingly) argue that this was started with the introduction of the 5.56 NATO as the standard service round, and continued in handguns with the adoption of the 9mm.

The latest and greatest in the smaller-lighter-faster club seem to be the Personal Defense Weapons, or PDW. Defined as being smaller and lighter than an assault rifle such as an M4, yet having better armor piercing capabilities than a pistol or pistol caliber submachine gun.

I remember being fascinated by PDWs when FN Herstal introduced the 5.7mm cartridge. Getting a Five-seveN pistol is still high on my “want list”, but I’m constantly deterred by the (usually out here) 4 digit price tag. I can’t really justify dropping $1,100 on a gun for the sheer novelty of it…yet. Like I’ve said, if someone (can you hear me Ruger?) decided to knock a semi-automatic carbine chambered for the round, then maybe. Or even a pistol chambered for the round *coughGlockcough* so that I’d be more able to justify purchasing a pistol chambered for 5.7mm.

Now, thanks to that godawful show Futureweapons on the Discover Channel, I’ve come to know of a (relatively) new PDW, which started production in 2001. It’s the H&K MP7, and quite frankly it looks pretty cool. I know that there’s no hope of one coming out for the civilian market, but maybe the pistol that H&K is planning on chambering in the unique 4.6mm round will hit the US market.

When I saw what the diameter and specifications of the MP7’s cartridge were, I started thinking and doing a little comparison. The 4.6 x 30mm round as chambered in the MP7 fires an .18 caliber, 25 grain projectile at 2200-2400 fps. Now, those numbers got me thinking, so I hopped quick as an Ahab can over to CCI’s website.

Much to my surprise, the .17 HMR, with a 20 grain bullet has a muzzle velocity of 2375 fps, which is exactly 4 feet per second less than the quoted muzzle velocity for the 4.6mm out of the MP7. Hornady quotes their 20 grain XTP bullet at the same speed of 2375 fps.

Now, the 4.6mm has the advantage of a steel core under the jacket, which obviously the .17 HMR lacks, additionally the 4.6mm has about 5 grains of weight on the little .17. However, all that leads me to the desire to go buy a bunch of 20 grain .17 HMR FMJ and see exactly what they’d do to different types of Kevlar vests.

Currently, the German Armed Forces have actually issued the MP7 to some of their special forces units, and it has been used in action in Afghanistan. Of course, I don’t have access to combat reports on the effectiveness of the round; but I sure would be interesting in seeing them.

I’m sure that somewhere I had a point about the trend towards smaller and faster rounds for the military; I honestly don’t recall what it was. I don’t think I was going to do something crazy like advocate the .17 HMR for personal defense; despite the fact that doing so would probably generate all sorts of blog traffic.

I think that what I was getting at was while I understand the military’s desire to offer a weapon and chambering that can defeat soft body armor while remaining compact enough for personnel to use in cramped conditions, going down to a sub-caliber like 4.6mm or .17 cal seems a little…silly. Especially when your latest and greates tactical bug-zapper doesn’t seem to run much hotter than a rimfire varmint round.

shooting

E-Postal Match: Reload drill

Posted on by Caleb

This month’s E-Postal match, called “Reload” is being hosted by SailorCurt. I went to the range for it today, and I had a pretty good time. A bit more “fun” than the Golf match; I will say that the ten-ring this month was ridiculously small. If I had shot this with my .45 Remington, I would have just shot the entire 9-ring out.

I took three guns for this, my Taurus Pt92 9mm which I entered in Class 1 (Carry guns), my Taurus Tracker .357 which I entered in Class 4 (Centerfire Fixed sights), and my ever present Walther P22, which I entered in Class 2 (Rimfire Fixed sights).

First up to the bench was the Pt92. I shot this with off the shelf Wolf 115 grain ball – and it would have been a great target had it not been for the flyers on the first target.

Pt92, 1st target

Pt92, 2nd target

I didn’t manage to break 80 on either of those targets, so I’m feeling like I left the door wide open for anyone who has even slightly better trigger discipline than I do. I mean honestly – a pair of twos and a three? LT Czerwonka would kick my ass if he knew about that.

Up next I shot the Taurus Tracker. I love this gun, and for good reason. It shoots very well and with the .38 Special +p I was running, recoil is mild at best. These targets were shot with CCI Blazer, 125 grain JHP +p.

I’m a little bitter, because as you can see on the first target, there’s a hit right above the “p” in Mr. Completely. After I had finished shooting and was waiting for the line to go cold to change my paper, the (expletive) next to me says to his idiot friend, “Hey, check this out” and proceeds to try for five shots on my target backer – a standard IDPA silhouette. He dropped on of his “headshots” onto my paper; which caused me to uh…politely remind him to keep his hits on his own paper.

Tracker, 1st target

Tracker, 2nd target

Overall, I’m pretty happy with the targets I shot with the Tracker, although again I got killed by a lack of trigger discipline. You take that three on the second target and make it a six or an eight, and well…you get the idea.

Lastly, I took out the P22. With its short barrel and CCI Stingers, this isn’t exactly a target gun; but it does pretty well. I was getting to antsy to move on to sighting in my 10/22 with its new scope (which I had brought to do after shooting the match), so I wound up and shot this pretty quick.

P22, 1st target

P22, 2nd target

Look Ma! Two 80’s! So, that was pretty anti-climatic.

All told, this was a pretty fun match. I feel pretty good about my Tracker score and alright about the P22 score, although frankly I wish I hadn’t spanked those three shots into oblivion.

Next month’s match is being hosted by The Conservative UAW Guy. Looking forward to it!

Uncategorized

I never do memes

Posted on by Caleb

Except for this one. I’m trying to kill some time before the range opens – so you all are cursed with too much information about Ahab.

So, without further ado – here you go.

WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? Surprise, surprise, my given name isn’t “Ahab”! My real name comes from a fairly heroic chap in the Old Testament; so heroic that God Hizzown Bad Self took some time to mention him.

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? During HBO’s Bury my Heart at Wounded Knee. That movie was really depressing.

DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? I can deal with it; it used to be a lot nicer than it is now. I don’t really use cursive that much, which caused my skills to atrophy.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Pastrami, baby. Pastrami.

DO YOU HAVE KIDS? No rugrats, yes. Mrs. Ahab is starting to get antsy, so I’m probably going to have to buy her a cat to forestall this a little longer.

IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? Probably not, actually. My personality type can be very combative, and I don’t generally get along with people who have similar personalities to mine.

DO YOU USE SARCASM A LOT? Wouldn’t dream of it.

DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yeah; the only things I’ve ever had surgically removed weren’t standard issue to begin with.

WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Hell yes! I mean, the big “bungee” fad is pretty much over, but I’ve always loved the sensation of freefall.

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? I’d have to go with some boring like Wheaties or Cheerios. Michael Jordan convinced me that Wheaties were good.

DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? My shoes that have laces; yes. I wear a lot off boots.

DO YOU THINK YOU ARE STRONG? For my size, certainly. I’m not even close to a “big guy”, seeing as I’m only five and a half feet tall. But I’m stronger than all the other short people I know!

WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? I don’t really know, honestly. It may be heresy, but I’m not a big fan of ice cream.

WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Body language and posture, actually. Most people aren’t overly conscious of their body language. There are a lot of times that I learn a lot more by what isn’t being said.

RED OR PINK? Pink, actually. I do have some pink shirts, and a couple of pink ties. Although I have noticed a phenomenon, that if I wear a pink shirt to a bar, rednecks will try to fight me. No joke.

WHAT IS THE LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? My arrogance. I can really be an arrogant prick sometimes; on the bright side though I’m aware of my problem.

WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? I don’t really have a good answer for that.

WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? I’m wearing blue jeans, and currently barefoot. In about ten minutes I’ll be wearing brown leather boots.

WHAT WAS THE LAST THING YOU ATE? A cup of coffee and a bowl of Rainier cherries. FYI, Rainier cherries are the best cherries on God’s green earth.

WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? iTunes is set to shuffle, right now it’s the Red Hot Chili Peppers, and up next is Mrs. Robinson by Simon & Garfunkel.

IF YOU WHERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? Oh man – I’d be “Flesh”. If you don’t know, that’s an old Bloom County joke.

FAVORITE SMELLS? Recently fired firearms, new baseball, and the smell of the high desert after a rain.

WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? My wife; before that it was my friend Flamingo.

FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? In the following order, Red Sox baseball, football, all other baseball, and Jeanette Lee playing pool.

HAIR COLOR[S]? Brown, same as always. I have boring hair.

EYE COLOR? Well, personally I’d call it “steely blue”, but blue will suffice.

DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? No; I have 20/20 in my right eye, and then my left eye has some kind of weird double astigmatism or some goofy shit that got the eye doctor really excited. So I wear glasses for some things.

FAVORITE FOOD? That’s like asking me to pick a favorite book. If pressed, I’d have to say clam chowder. But good clam chowder; not that canned bullshit. There was this little restaurant in Boston…god.

SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Happy endings, actually. For whatever reason I’m a sucker for a good happy ending.

LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? We watch a lot of movies. The last movie I saw in theaters was Ocean’s 13, which was actually quite good. It was so good that it made up for the suck-fest that was Ocean’s 12.

WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Green t-shirt, with a “Peace through superior firepower” logo.

SUMMER OR WINTER? I grew up in the High Desert of California. I have plenty of reasons to hate the summer, but now that I live in Indiana, I hate winter even more. So it’s not so much which I like more, but more a contest of which I hate less. And I hate, hate, hate being cold.

HUGS OR KISSES? I don’t like being touched by people I’m not married to – can I pick “none of the above?”

FAVORITE DESSERT? Cheesecake. Cheesecake. Cheesecake. Cheesecake. There is no other dessert.

MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? I quite frankly have no idea. This is the first one of this things I’ve done; so I’m not going to expect anything.

LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? See above.

WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? My computer monitor, silly. How do you think I’m typing this?

WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? Uh, my mouse. Same as at work. I use to have a cool mousepad with a logo of Big bird with an AK47 and the caption, “It’s a beautiful day in the ‘hood!”

WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON T.V. LAST NIGHT? Star Trek: Enterprise. News flash! I’m a closet nerd!

FAVORITE SOUND[S]? You ever hit a baseball just right? That crack is my favorite sound.

ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Rolling Stones, the Beatles never played “Paint it Black”.

WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? Hahahaha – that’s a great question. I guess if you define “home” as where I grew up, the longest linear distance I was ever at was when I was overseas.

DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? I’m a fair hand with a pistol, I guess.

WHERE WERE YOU BORN? Methodist Hospital in Van Nuys, CA.

WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? I don’t really know, actually. I suppose any answer would be cool.

Uncategorized

Gum chewing

Posted on by Caleb

I haven’t done a manners post in a while; generally those only happen when my sense of proper decorum is offended by the crass behavior of some miscreant.

I don’t really like gum chewing. I’ve personally never enjoyed repeatedly masticating a piece of sugary goo until it looses all flavor – but some people do. That’s fine, I suppose, but there are certainly times when chewing gum isn’t really appropriate.

Additionally, if you must chew gum, try to keep your mouth shut so you don’t smack your lips like some Neanderthal. You know, when I think about it; that’s what actually annoys me about gum chewing. The majority of people that chew gum don’t chew with their mouth closed, which causes them to produce that incredibly disgusting sound of lip-smacking, coupled with the fact that I can view their partially chewed gum rolling around in their pie-hole.

I don’t care if you chew gum. But if you do, chew with your mouth shut. And don’t talk to me on the phone when you do, I can hear you chewing and it’s disgusting.

Uncategorized

Warbird Brewing Company

Posted on by Caleb

I’ve mentioned Warbird Brewing Company once before, I had acquired some of their excellent product and decided to post a favorable review.

Well, they’ve completely converted me now, since they did the impossible yesterday. A little backstory, my wife hates beer. The only beers I’ve ever been able to get to her to admit that she “likes” are generally really fruity, for instance the Sam Adams Cherry Wheat.

Last night, she tried some of Warbird’s T-6 Red, and I just about fell over when she announced that “she liked it”.

So, if anyone from Warbird Brewing happens across the site, bravo. You have done what I though to be impossible, get my wife to like a “real” beer.

Well played, gentlemen.

sports

Big sports weekend

Posted on by Caleb

First off, congratulations to the San Antonio Spurs on winning their 4th NBA Championship in 9 years. I can’t honestly say that I watched more than 5 minutes of the games; but the Spurs have always been a classy organization, and Tim Duncan is a good guy. I was a semi-fan during the days of David Robinson, one of the finest examples of an athlete and a gentleman to ever play sports.

Now, the big focus of (my) sporting weekend is that the Red Sox are starting a series against the San Francisco (spit) Giants. To understand why I’m so excited about this series, you have to go back to my childhood, a decent percentage of which was spent at Chavez Ravine watching the LA Dodgers play. The Dodgers are still one of “my” teams; including in my love for the Dodgers is a deep and abiding hatred of the Giants.

If you couple that with the fact that I absolutely despise Barry Bonds with every fiber in my being and am gleefully looking forward to watching the Fenway crowd boo him means that I am excited about this series.

I want the Red Sox to club the Giants into another solar system. Quite frankly, if the Red Sox intentionally walked Bonds every time he came to plate, I might cry a tear of joy.

Fuck Barry Bonds, fuck the Giants, and GO SOX!