I swear that the following conversation is true to as best as I remember, although I may have been slightly intoxicated at the time.
[Hippie]: Oh my god, do you recycle? I, like, totally love recycling. It’s totally important to the environment.
[Me]: Uh, not really. We’d have to pay an extra twenty five bucks a month for recycling where we live, and we don’t really use aluminum cans or plastic bottles.
[Hippie]: But what about newspaper? Don’t you recycle that?
[Me]: No, not really. We don’t get a newspaper.
[Hippie]: But, recycling is really important!
[Me]: Well, wait, I do recycle something. I recycle brass, in large quantities!
[Hippie]: Brass, how, do you recycle brass?
[Me]: Well, a lot of friends of mine, myself included, use brass in large quantities. Whatever I don’t grab to reuse myself, I donate to them for their reuse.
At that juncture, the conversation ended, because the noise of the bar became too loud for me to overcome by force of volume alone. However, I could tell by the confused look on the face of the hippie that she had no idea what I was talking about…which made it kind of fun in the end.