The dangers of being a gun nut

So last night, I’m in bed about to go to sleep, when the following conversation occurs.

Mrs. Ahab: Honey, can you wash the sheets tomorrow?
Me: Sure.
Mrs. Ahab: Oh, and there’s a black spot on the (bright yellow) comforter. If it doesn’t come out and it’s some kind of gun/oil/lube stain…(her voice trails off, leaving the threat to be inferred by me, which is a lot scarier).
Me: Uh…okay, I’ll take care of it.
Mrs. Ahab: I can’t think of anything else it could be. So it had better come out.
Me: Yup. (trying to act calm)

See, in my head, I’m having a panic attack, because I do practice magazine change drills over the bed, but never with lubed up mags and certainly not over the yellow comforter…I think.

Anyway, if I don’t post tomorrow, it’s because I’m dead.


  1. Um… been there, done that. Here’s a marriage tip from one dude to another:

    Use a laundry basket. (Maybe add some gym-worthy clothing… DO NOT PRACTICE IF HER DESIGNER STUFF IS IN THE BASKET, EH? [Been there, done that…])

  2. “I’ll take care of it” — good answer; up to and including buying new sheets instead of more ammo…glad you didn’t have to.

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